19 years ago, the most precious thing happened. I became a Mom. I can't believe how fast the years can fly by.

In honor of your birthday, Chad, I wanted to share 19 reasons that I love you with all my heart.

1. I love how I had to teach you to cry, but you came here already knowing how to laugh.

2. I love how you have showed all those people and doctors wrong and thrived full of life.

3. I love how resilient you are. No matter how many doctors or therapists you have had to see, you kept doing it with a smile.

4. I love your smile.

5. I love your turbo charged personality.

6. I love how you always have something funny to say.

7. I love your laugh.

8. I love your goofy sense of humor.

9. I love your amazing talent of being able to stretch your ears out.

10. I love your clowning around.

11. I love how no one's watermelon is safe around you.

12. I love your country boy style.

13. I love how you find joy in the simple things.

14. I love how much you love animals and babies.

15. I love the fact that you inherited my love for holiday decorating.

16. I love your awesome tower building skills.

17. I love seeing your joy and enthusiasm in knocking them down.

18. I love your hugs.

19. I love you simply because you are YOU!

Happy Birthday, my Chad! May the force be with you always!

Want to know a little more about Chad? Check out the post Night to Shine...A Mom's Point of View!

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"You need to discipline better!"

"She is too smart to act like that." 

"Her bad behavior and angry attitude is a choice."

"A good spanking will cure that."

"If he can't sit still, he doesn't need to be here."

"What's wrong with him?"

These are just a few of the many phrases that I have heard through the years.

I've heard them in school, from teachers, at church, from friends, extended family, and from total strangers.

And yes, they cut to my core. I hurt for my children and fear what words they may face in the future.

If people can say these things to my face, what are they saying behind my back?

I have two beautiful children both with their own special needs or disabilities. However, in my house, we call them their super powers.

Oh yeah, that's right. We celebrate their differences.  We focus on what can be done, what can be improved upon, and we persevere. 

But this article is about perceptions.

The perception of others, a mama's perception, and a child's perception, particularly concerning my daughter, my youngest.

She is about to turn 13, full of life and laughter, and is currently being treated for high anxiety, Tourettes, and Aspergers.

She is highly intelligent, craves learning, and reads like her life depends on it.

If you were to meet her, you would probably instantly see how bright she is.  You would be surprised at her age, as well, after that first meeting. She looks older than she is and, as my mother would say, "She has an old soul."

What you can't see is how she gets a thought stuck in her head and worries about it over and over.

She worries about our tiny budget, worries over the rise in crime, worries that she can't meet expectations in school, worries about college, worries about nuclear war; the list goes on and on.

You might see a slight tick in her body movement or hear a slight vocal tic from her. But you won't see or hear the tics she tries so hard to control.

Anxiously keeping them inside, she worries if she is being annoying or if people think she's just weird.

Holding her tics inside is taxing physically and mentally on her, and fuels her anxiety even more.

The tics eventually will come out, usually when she comes in from school and can relax knowing our home is a judge free zone.

Lauren's perception of any given situation is askewed to what a "normal" person's perception may be.

Sometimes her mind plays tricks on her and attributes factors or emotions that may not actually be present or needed at the time.

With her anxiety, her mind is automatically suspicious, fearful, worrisome, and anxiously waiting for the downside in a conversation or situation.

With the Tourettes, her mind seeks out anger, conflict, accusations, and turmoil to prepare itself for the always present battle at hand.

The Aspergers brings in the first or strongest emotion it primarily encountered with the other person involved in the conversation and will not let go of that emotion lightly or easily. In other words, if Lauren's first few encounters with you were unpleasant or argumentative, then in her mind every encounter from then on will be unpleasant or argumentative.

This isn't just her opinion of a person, it is what her mind is telling her.  And, because of the aforementioned conflicts, it is very hard to distinguish between what she is perceiving to be true and what is actually true in any given conversation.

It is easy to see how difficult this may be on relationships and every day life for Lauren.

Other's Perceptions

Strangers, school personnel, new friends, or anyone who doesn't know what she struggles with may see Lauren as a difficult, argumentative, and problem child.

This is what hurts. This is what needs to change.

I was very surprised at the lack of knowledge of this, particularly at Lauren's public school in the past.

Even after my countless attempts to explain, accommodate, and mediate, the school personnel still see it only as a behavior problem that can be corrected with strict discipline.

And because of this lack of knowledge and refusal to learn on their part, I pulled her out to homeschool with only a few weeks left of that particular year.

Mama's Perception

As I said before, this article is about perceptions, that is the perception of others, a mama's perception, and a child's perception.

The last one I want to talk about is my perception, the mama's.

My children are not perfect, as I am not perfect. I get frustrated. I get depressed and exhausted and feel lost at times.

I can see their flaws.

But I can also see their beauty.

With Lauren, this is what see. A beautiful child growing up way too fast.

I see her passion for learning all she can about herself and the world.

I see her love for others and her loyalty to them.

I see her nurturing and kind disposition with animals.

I see her amazing talents on the written page, a canvas, or in her song.

Oh yes, I can see her.

So, perception can change depending on who you are, the situation you are in, and what you allow yourself to see.

Maybe if we all can open our minds and eyes just a  little wider the next time we see someone struggling with a child "throwing a tantrum".

Or, if we see a woman holding up the line at the grocery store counting her change out to buy that milk with messy hair and wrinkled clothes.

Perhaps, give a sweet smile instead of an eye roll, or just say "Good morning," and, "Have a nice day."

And maybe, just maybe, we can change the world a little at a time.

Let me introduce myself.

My name is Shannon Dewease and I grew up in a little town in South Mississippi.

I was born, however, in Louisiana. I guess you could say I was born a Cajun but raised a redneck!

Let's just say I'm a born and raised Southern country girl who loves her Southern roots!

I grew up at a time when your neighbors knew your name and came to check on you if they haven't seen you outside working on your flower beds recently.

Those same neighbors would, also, call you to let you know that their peas or corn was ready. So you would grab your bucket and head on over to share the bounty.

It was a time when front doors and cars were left unlocked, the screen doors had a squeak then that bang when shut, Grandmas always wore aprons, and hearing the crickets at night was all you needed to sleep.

Ahh... I love the South and those memories of bygone days. And those days are definitely gone.

Don't get me wrong! I love my air conditioner, my cell phone, and, well...all the luxuries of today!  But everything is so much faster, sleeker, rushed, and chaotic!

It seems that the older I get, the more I have to remind myself to slow down and take time to just breathe. When I do, I can focus on the many many blessings in my life.

"Just slow down... and take time to breath"

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So, that's how I came up with the name Southern Blessed Chaos.

Clear as mud, huh? Let me see if I can explain it a little better.

I am the very proud Mother of two children, both with separate special needs.  I am homeschooling one while the other attends public school.  My days are filled with numerous doctor appointments, IEP meetings, tantrums, and frustrations.

I have been "potty training" my son, Chad, for numerous years and he still waits until the very last second to run to the bathroom. 

This results in him peeing slowly from one end of the house to the other as he tries to get to the bathroom. To learn more about Chad and his super powers (that's what we call his disabilities), feel free to check out the page dedicated to Meet Chad!


My daughter, Lauren ,who is being treated for Tourettes Syndrome, Asperger's, and high anxiety (you can read more about these conditions in my post Perceptions), has physical tics and will let out yips, screams, and random words with no notice.

She, also, will argue me down if I say that the sky is blue, not "teal peacock blue" as she sees it.

Meet Lauren page is still under construction, but to find out more about her super powers, check out The Laurenism!

Our house is not a quiet one, as you can see... Chaos.

But my chaos is blessed in so many ways. I have a hard working husband working long hours so that I can stay home. We don't have any extra money but by the beautiful Grace of God, family, and friends, we have what we need.


As I am, once again, cleaning up the four room path of pee, I can't help but to smile because when he does reach the bathroom he screams every time with self pride "Whew, I made it Mommy!"

My daughter, even though she is arguing with me, has amazing insight and sees the beauty in most everything. Yep, now that I take a second look, I think that sky is teal peacock blue.

So you see...Blessings.

Southern Blessed Chaos, my life contained in three wonderful words.

I hope you enjoyed hearing a little about my life. And I look forward to sharing more with you soon.  But right now, I've gotta go. I just heard my son holler "Whew! I made it Mommy!"

Until next time, remember to look for the blessings!